In the seven months since I first wrote this, I have received a lot of comments from readers. I have received even more private e-mails; the majority from women who just wanted to say thanks for sharing my experience with my C-section, and they too, had a similar experience.
Not all comments have been positive, and I didn’t expect them to be. It seems the biggest “complaints” from the comments about this post, is that C-sections are not really like what I wrote about, and I am trying to scare women. Since there are a lot of comments, and I am sure not everyone reads all the comments and my replies before leaving a comment of their own, I wanted to clarify my viewpoint about this post, hopefully BEFORE the post is read.
This is a realistic account of MY C-section. There are certain aspects to a C-section that EVERY woman will experience, such as scaring, and increased chances of uterine rupture with future pregnancies. There are other aspects to this account which I experienced. These may or may not be experienced by every woman who has a C-section. Just like no two vaginal births are the same, no two C-sections are the same.
I agree and support emergency C-sections 100%, and they do save lives. However, as you will read, I believe that the medical community is over-using C-sections in non-medical emergency situations (such as breech births). I feel I need to clarify this point as well, because when I originally wrote the post, my goal was to inform women who may be facing a planned or elective C-section (not an emergency one), and to offer my viewpoint from my perspective, on what a C-section is like, since my experience with my C-section was not a emergency C-section.
I wrote this post to inform women who suspect there might be more to a C-section than what she is being told, like I was. That is the spirit of the post-to inform. Like the famous quote, “knowledge is power.” The more you know, the more informed decision you can make.
To the readers who feel I am scaring women, I am sorry my account of my C-section is scary. Honestly, it was pretty scary. There are countless TV shows, websites, books, magazines, Hollywood celebrities, and doctors who will tell you C-sections are not scary, are not painful, and they are nothing to worry about. That was not the reality I found at all. I do not want to sugar coat, or tone down my experience. If I were to do that, there wouldn’t be much point it writing about it.
So having said this, before you read the post, please be forewarned that this post could be scary. I am attempting to share what a real C-section was like. If that has the potential to scare you, then please think twice before reading it. If you are searching for information on what happens during a C-section, possible complications that could arise, pictures of the procedure, the recovery period, possible impact on the family, and general information on C-sections, and how the medical community using them, and feel this information would not scare you, than this may be something you would be interested in reading.
If you have a comment after the post, please feel free to comment. I read every comment, and try to respond when appropriate. Please know I will delete any overly disrespectful comment. You don’t have to agree with me, but please keep it civil.
Thank you.
Heather- A Mama’s Blog
This post has been several months in the making. I have been thinking about what I wanted to convey in writing a post about Cesarean sections, better known as C-sections, or even as a “C.”
As I thought about it, there were so many different angles to take. I thought about writing a very detailed researched post, but you can find a lot of those by doing a Google search on C-sections. I decided in the end, I was going to write what comes naturally from my personal research and experience of having a C-section.
My intent for writing this post is to convey the reality, which is not often mentioned, of women, their new babies, and families, endure from C-sections. It is not meant to judge or make any mother feel bad who has had a C-section. I write a lot of the things that I wished I had known before hand about C-sections, which I was not told. This post is only meant to inform, and bring to light, issues involved with C-sections, that as a woman, and a mother I seldom hear anyone (doctors included) talk about in our society.
- My C-Section
I had a C-section with my first birth, with Ryan, only because he was a breech baby, and refused to turn. I wasn’t very informed on other alternatives for turning breech babies at the time, other than the external version, and accepted having a C-section was the only way to give birth to my baby.
- Lack of Options
Unfortunately, it pretty much WAS my only alternative. I did not feel comfortable having a home birth being a first time mother, with a breech baby. Not to mention, there were zero doctors in my area who would attend the birth of a breech baby. This is despite living in a college area, with a number of top rated medical facilities. So we agreed to the C-section, but really what choice did we have?
It has always bothered me more alternatives are not available for birthing breech babies. I did not want a C-section, but it was my only option. Even a home birth isn’t always an option- in several states (mine included), it is actually against the law for a midwife to attend a breech birth! This isn’t to say it isn’t done, but if you know ahead of time your baby is breech, this could be problematic in finding a midwife who is comfortable attending a breech birth, and possibly be in violation of the law, and thus be putting her certifications and her practice in jeopardy.
Finding an OB these days, who will deliver a breech baby, is a joke at best- even though as I found out later, delivering breech babies vaginally is very safe, in the majority of situations. In my opinion, this is a HUGE failure in the medical community to have only one option for a mother facing a breech birth- an automatic C-section.
- Major Surgery
C-sections are MAJOR abdominal surgery. The pain is agonizing. I never experienced greater pain in my life, than after my surgical C-section. Even going through natural labor and contractions with a VBAC (vaginal birth after Cesarean) birth of my second child for eleven hours, the pain was not as bad as it had been with the C-section.
The best way I can describe it is imagine your most painful, intense, contraction, and multiply it by at least 50 to 100%, depending on your pain tolerance. Now, realize the pain does not go away, after 30 seconds or a minute like the pain during contractions does. It is constant and never-ending. That level of pain is with you for DAYS (not seconds or minutes). Imagine your insides feeling like they are going to split open for several weeks, after the surgery, every time you laugh, cry, sneeze, get out of bed, stand up, or move too fast.
- Media Portrayal of C-Sections
It is also very disturbing to me how some avenues of the media, and celebrities portray C-sections. I have seen on numerous TV shows- including a prime time, number one show, (named Gray’s Anatomy, to be specific), where women who refuse a C-section, because they desire to have a NORMAL, vaginal birth, are portrayed as fanatic, and ridiculous. There is another show, The Baby Story, which shows many elective C-section births.
As a new mother-to-be, and even before I was pregnant, I watched The Baby Story. In my case, seeing so many C-section births, almost made it seem like it was a normal, healthy, alternative to giving actual birth. I NEVER saw the downside: pain, infections, and inability to get back to regular life after a C-section, shown on The Baby Story.
It is almost glamorized by the media when a famous celebrity has a C-section. “Too posh to push,” is how they sum it up. Whether that is the case or not, it is misleading to millions of women, who are faced with the same decision. What is NEVER mentioned is even if a celebrity chooses to have an elective C-section; she has resources available to her, which a normal woman does not. The celebrity can hire nurses, nannies, chefs, and cleaning services to take over for her while she recovers from surgery, when an average woman cannot. The strain and time it takes to recover from a C-section puts the average family under enormous stress.
Yet, the media continues to glorify and glamorize C-sections. It even seems like they make a special point to say, “Actress A had her baby (or gave birth), born by Cesarean section.” I have yet to see, hear, or read, “Actress A had her baby, born by normal, vaginal birth.”
I certainly never gave much thought to what really was involved with a C-section. I honestly thought, since I had seen so many women on The Baby Story, give birth by C-section, and they seemed fine, and never mentioned any drawbacks, then certainly I could handle it.
- What A C-Section Is Really Like
Naive? Absolutely. C-sections are NOT as they are portrayed on “reality” TV shows, prime time TV shows, or by the media when reporting a famous woman had a C-section. Maybe if I hadn’t been bombarded by all these positive messages about C-sections, I would have thought twice about it. Maybe if I had, had someone actually tell me what a C-section really was like, I could have prepared better. Maybe if I could have found in a mainstream pregnancy book, the truth about cCsections, I would have known what I was getting into. But I didn’t, and at the time, all the information I had, said C-sections were no big deal.
C-sections ARE a big deal. So big, your life will never be the same. Here are some of the REAL outcomes from C-sections:
You may lose precious time with your newborn baby. Time that you will NEVER get back, because you are doped up on strong narcotic pain medications for at least 24 hours- usually longer- after the birth. Your baby might be groggy after birth in most cases, because the epidural and or spinal tap medication used to numb you, is in their system too.
Instead of spending the first few moments after birth holding, nursing, and bonding, with your baby, your hands may be tied down. Because of this, you probably won’t be able to hold your baby during this time, while you are being stitched back up.
Your baby may be taken out the operating room from you, while your uterus and incision site are being stitched. In my case, my hands were still restrained. You will probably have to wait at least 30 minutes after the birth (usually longer), before you can really hold your baby for the first time.
If you are lucky, your baby will want to breastfeed, even though he/she could still be groggy from the birth. If not, then starting breastfeeding becomes a much bigger challenge. As any new mother will tell you, breastfeeding a brand new baby can be hard at first. Now imagine trying to position your baby to nurse, but you can’t have your new baby’s feet, or body anywhere near your incision because you can’t risk having them push, or kick you in that area. You can use a pillow to block the site, but it becomes another aspect to figure out.
By having a C-section, your chances for hemorrhage, post-partum infection, internal injuries, post-partum depression, breastfeeding problems, reproductive problems, and maternal death, are increased than if you gave birth vaginally.
By having an elective C-section your baby’s chances for neonatal respiratory distress syndrome (RDS), physician caused prematurity (since they can only guess, what the correct due date is), persistent pulmonary hypertension (PPH), are cut by the surgeon’s scalpel two to six percent of the time, and are less likely to be breastfed, are increased than babies who are born vaginally.
In most cases, you will have metal staples in your incision for several days after the surgery. I thought my tummy looked liked Frankenstein’s forehead. It was so awful I couldn’t even look at it.
Your uterus will have permanent scar tissue, which is at a higher risk for rupture with future pregnancies.
You will have an scar just above your pubic bone for the rest of your life. Your stomach will more than likely hang over your scar, known as “belly flap,” for the rest of your life. Your incision / scar area will probably be numb for several months, several years, or even for the rest of your life.
Your birthing options with future pregnancies are SEVERELY limited, after you have a c-section. There is a saying, “once a C-section, always a C-section.” VBAC is a very safe choice for the majority of women, but VBAC’sare discouraged and you will be lucky to find a doctor and a hospital that supports this choice. In some states, it is against the law for midwives to attend VBAC births. In all actuality, you will be pressured to have a repeat C-section with future pregnancies, even though with every subsequent C-section, the uterine rupture rate increases, especially during pregnancy as the uterus expands. Usually another C-section is the only choice offered to you, even if that isn’t the best choice for you, and your baby.
You will probably have a longer recovery, after a C-section than if you had given birth vaginally. You can’t drive for usually 10 days. You are sore, and it can be a struggle to just get up and move, let alone walk, sit-up, sit, and lie down. It is recommended that you don’t climb any stairs for two weeks-too bad if your house has stairs- it can be very painful, every time you have to go up or down your stairs. You don’t dare laugh or cough for several days, because it just hurts too much. You may only have a limited amount of pain medication, because most doctors want to “wean” you off the strong pain narcotics a few days after the C-section. Keep in mind, this is all while you have a brand new baby to take care of as well.
(Many of these facts in the above blue boxes can be found on Childbirth Connection’s page on C-sections.)
- Recovery Time and Complications
Being a new mother is one of the most challenging life experiences. We rise to the task, but when you are trying to recover from a MAJOR surgery, YOU need to rest, and be taken care of. That does not happen after a C-section, for the majority of women. Maternal instincts take over, and we need to be with our babies. We push our pain, and discomforts to the background, in order to take care of our baby, and family.
This only adds to the recovery time, and often results in women “overdoing it,” which leads to ruptured scars, which leads to infected scars, which leads to another hospital stay, which leads back to square one, all over again. It can be a vicious cycle.
The general thought is it usually takes about 3 weeks, to recover from vaginal birth, and 6 weeks to recover from a C-section, IF everything goes well.
That was not true for me at all. It took me about 12 weeks to feel almost 100% again- meaning I didn’t have pain that kept me from doing daily activities. That is 3 months! If I were to count the time that it took for my scar to heal, and to not feel any pain whatsoever- I would say NEVER. Even now, four years later, if I move at an odd angle, I will get a weird pain in my abdomen, that I never had before having a C-section.
After the VBAC birth I had with my second baby, I felt back to normal, after about a month. Yes, there was pain, discomfort, and stitches involved with a vaginal birth, but it was SO, SO, SO much more manageable and less painful than a C-section. Having given birth both by a C-section and vaginally, I would pick a vaginal birth every time- without hesitation. As one of my friends who also had a C-section, and a vaginal birth said, “The worse vaginal birth, beats the best C-section anytime.” No wonder we were made to give birth vaginally, not surgically!
- Risks Outweigh The Benefits
C-sections are a medical tool, and should only be performed when absolutely necessary. C-sections DO have a place in obstetrics, and I have a friend who would have died, if she had not gotten an emergency C-section.
The World Health Organization (WHO) says anytime a country’s C-section rate rises above 15%, then the risks outweigh the benefits the surgery could provide. In the US, the C-section rate is 30.2% of all births. Just 100 years ago in the US, almost every baby born, was born at home! What has happened? Clearly, something is very wrong, and thousands of women are receiving unnecessary surgical C-sections, where the risks are outweighing the benefits.
- The “Hidden” High Costs of C-Sections
Another aspect that is hardly ever mentioned is the financial aspect and costs to a family. Obviously a C-section is more expensive than a vaginal birth. My C-section in 2004 cost 50% more than my vaginal hospital birth in 2006. That was with no complications- just a “by-the-book C-section”. Even with insurance, a family pays substantially more for a C-section, and that is just for the procedure! Most women have to stay in the hospital for a minimum of three days after a C-section, compared to anywhere from 12-48 hours with a vaginal birth. I had to stay for five days. Not only do you get charged for your care, but you get charged for the care your baby gets too.
If you factor in the extra long recovery time, the costs of hiring some household help, extra doctor and or hospital visits due to infection, pain medication, extra time the father may take off of work, to name a few- it is astounding how expensive a C-section is, and how fast it all adds up.
For a woman who has to return to work, 6, 8, or 12 weeks after giving birth, she may not even be fully recovered from surgery, before she has to take on the demands from a job as well.
- Ignorance Is Not Bliss
I believe that every woman who is faced with the possibility of having a C-section (emergency situation aside) should be given ALL of the information on the surgical procedure including the emotional and financial aspects beforehand. Ignorance is NOT bliss- it just keeps you from having to face the reality of this surgical procedure until you are in the thick of it, with nothing left to do, but see it and its consequences through.
During my recovery, I was in so much pain, and realized that I didn’t even know why, until my husband (who had watched the surgery) said, “If you had seen what they did, you would know why you are in pain.”
Then it hit me that I had no idea, what they even did during the C-section. They never show that on The Baby Story either. I have decided to include several REAL pictures from actual C-sections that I found by doing Google and Yahoo searches. Believe it or not, pictures like this were very hard to find. There just aren’t that many pictures of actual C-sections out there. I spent a lot of time trying to find pictures with the goal of showing what really happens during a C-section.
The pictures are graphic in nature- that is the reality of a C-section. I have provided the link to the site where you can view the pictures as well. There will be descriptions of what the picture is of.
Since some will prefer not to look at the pictures, I will include my closing comments now, instead of at the end of the pictures.
- Conclusion
Despite what we are told in the media, C-sections are NOT glamorous, or posh. If you choose to view the pictures below, you will see what it really is- bloody, painful, and surgical.
The emotional and financial toll it can take on you and your family is massive. Ironically, a lot of women choose C-sections, because they think it is a lot less painful than vaginal birth. You will have no pain during the C-section itself, because you are numb from usually the chest down. But, a surgical C-section birth is not a way to avoid pain during birth. Ironically, in most cases, it will cause you substantial amounts of more pain in the long run.
The end result of a C-section is beautiful- a new, hopefully healthy baby and mother. For me, that was my goal. But I never realized beforehand, as I wrote, you lose a lot of time with your newborn when recovering from the surgery. Time that you only get one chance at. If you have to return to work, as you know, your time is not endless with your baby, and that time goes by in a blink of an eye.
No mother I know, would willingly give up her precious time with her new baby, to attend to surgical dressings, be “out of it” due to pain medication, maybe miss out on breastfeeding, if they choose to do so, raise their risk of post-partum infection, and depression, and be in pain for weeks. Yet, that is what happens to one degree or another, with EVERY C-section.
If you prefer not to look at the pictures, I hope some of this post will help you, a friend, a sister, a daughter, a cousin, or anyone, who needed more information and truth on what is involved in a C-section.
I know first hand that sometimes a C-section is your only option. In these cases, I hope some of what I wrote may help in giving you more information on what to expect, so you can prepare better than I did. If you are considering a C-section that is not medically necessary, or you have other options, I hope if you have read this far, that maybe you are reconsidering having a c-section.
While writingthis post, I decided to write another post in the near future with ideas for mothers who are preparing for a C-section. I plan to include information on things she can do to prepare for it before hand. I also will include ideas and tips she can do post-partrum, to help with the healing process, pain, and the overall transition back to family life. E-mail me if you have any tips or suggestions, you would like to share.
Every woman deserves to know ALL of the facts, before facing a major surgery, especially one with the goal of bringing a new life into the world. Doctors should take into account ALL the factors, pre-AND post-surgery, on how C-sections can affect their patients and their families. The entire medical community (doctors, hospitals, etc.), should start offering vaginal breech baby birth options. Finally, C-sections should stop being glamorized by the media as a healthy alternative to vaginal birth. It is very dishonest and misleading.
I sincerely hope by sharing my experience, and facts that usually aren’t disclosed about C-sections, it can help women who are facing C-sections, to make an informed decision.
I would love to hear your comments and feedback.
- Additional Information
I urge anyone facing a C-section to read the article, “Cesearean Birth in a Culture of Fear.” It is written by Wendy Ponte, and it appeared in the September/October 2007 issue of Mothering magazine, and is the best article I have read on the subject to date. If you can get the actual magazine, there were some very good illustrations, showing the C-section procedure. I tried to find these illustrations on-line, but was unsuccessful. I was able to find something along the same lines, in a slide show presentation, with ten drawings from The New York Times, showing the C-section procedure. (These drawings are not graphic- they are what you would see in a newspaper.)
************************WARNING!!!!! ********************************
************DO NOT READ OR SCROLL ANY FARTHER IF YOU DO NOT WISH TO VIEW C-SECTION PICTURES- GRAPHIC IN NATURE************
Vertical incision (Note: most incisions today are transverse (bikini) incisions. The reason for the vertical incision was the location of fibroids)
Low transverse (bikini cut) incision in the early stages of being cut
Baby being delivered through the uterine incision
Uterus during a c-section, outside the body, after the baby has been born
Above pictures from Jefferson Hospital.
C-section in progress- notice the baby’s hand or foot? Notice how far apart the incision is now? Notice the clamp on the very top of the uterus to keep it “open?” Four of these clamps are usually used- one on the top, bottom, and one on each side to keep the uterus open. Notice how many layers of muscle, tissue, and tendons are cut through? Notice how wide the uterous is cut? This is why there is so much pain after the surgery- your uterus, muscles, tendons, and tissues are literally pried apart
Another picture- they will ”work” and pry the baby out by tugging on his foot, until more of the baby’s body is exposed, and then will pull the baby out.
Above pictures at TheFetus.net. There are some more pictures from this series, but it looks like this was a c-section because of a complication. Usually the bladder is held in place with an instrument, and there is a chance of bladder damage from this.
Removing the staples from a C-section incision.
There is also a picture of a new C-section scar held together with staples, and more post-partum C-section scars, including verticle ones, in this gallery at About.com .
Mother 1: C-section scar 2 days after the surgery, 20 year-old mother
Mother 1: (The same mother as in picutre above), her C-section scar, 11 weeks after the surgery
Mother 2: The C-section overhang (”belly flap”)- this is after the first c-section (third pregnancy), this 28-year old mother had, one year after the surgery
Picture from Terra, (a mother who read this post and sent me some of her C-section pictures) of her C-section incision
Picture 1 of Terra’s Infection at Incision Site
Picture 2 of Terra’s Infection at Incision Site
Mother 2: (picture 2) Same mother as the above picture; side view
Mother 3: Picture of scar, more than 3 years after C-section (it is the second line, towards the bottom-not the thin red line)
Mother 4: Pictures of infected C-section scar, 3 to 4 months after the surgery, during this 38 year-old mother’s
fifth round of antibiotic treatments for the infection
Above pictures from http://www.caesarean.org.uk/ScarPictures.html#group1. There are several more pictures of C-section scars at this site, in various stages of healing.
My scar- 4 years after C-section.
Another picture of my scar. On the right end of the scar, you can see how it looks indented. A few of my staples became loose, while I was in the hospital, so the skin there was open, while healing. It left a lot larger scar on that end of the incision, and tends to “cave in.” I doubt this will ever go away. The marks higher up on my stomach, are the marks from my pants. :-)
(All of these photos, the ones of myself included, are unedited. They have been reduced in size, however so they could fit on the site. )
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Crunchy Domestic Goddess says:
thank you for your detailed, well-researched post. i can tell you put a great deal of time and energy into it. you brought up a lot of things i know i never would’ve thought about either - like breastfeeding possibly being harder because you can’t let the baby anywhere near your incision. that thought never even crossed my mind.
also, it was very interesting to see the photos. i’d never seen a baby born via c-section before. wow!
i’m glad that your c-section has made you such a strong advocate and i hope that by sharing your experiences, others may make a truly informed decision.
January 31st, 2008 at 6:11 pm
New mommy with C-section says:
Hello,
I really appreciate your highly detailed explanation of your c-section experience. It is exactly how I feel today. I found out my baby was in breech presentation when I was 38 weeks and the doctor said the same thing that they can try to turn the baby or I need to have a C-section. I was horrified because I felt like I did not have many options. The truth of the matter is I didn’t even have the chance to turn the baby because that same week I went into labor and when I got to the hospital I was 3 cm and I could only have a C-section.
I was angry inside, and was overwhelmed by emotions. Now, after almost three weeks I am beginning to accept what happened to me. I realize my body will never be the same again but I try to look at the outcome which is my healthy son.
It does feel good to read your blog and know that other women are speaking out because C-sections should be avoided as much as possible. Thank you
February 15th, 2008 at 11:03 pm
amamasblog says:
New Mommy,
Thanks for your comment- I am so happy that you have a heathly son, and that is the ultimate goal.
I think more women like yourself, are realizing that their C-sections were their only options and even though we are happy our babies are healthy, we still wish more options were and had been available to us.
I believe the only way to change this trend is for those of us who do feel this way, is to start speaking up and sharing our experiences.
If you ever have another baby, l’d encourage you to look into VBAC- it is very safe usually for the majority of women. My OB told me for women who had a previous C-section only because their baby was breech (no other complications) the success rate for VBAC was around 85%. I am happy to say I was in that statistic, and it kind of made everything come “full circle” for me- I felt like I had at least the opportunity to give my body a chance to give birth.
Congratulations again on your son. Please take it easy, and give yourself plenty of time to heal and to rest. I think taking care of yourself too, the weeks after a C-section are key to having a healthy recovery.
I hope you will continue to check in here, and let me know how your recovery is going.
February 16th, 2008 at 10:04 pm
Kim says:
I had a very positive outcome with both sections. You can hardly see my scar at all. It is true about the hanging skin… but for me it’s probably because both my babies were over 9 lbs and I’m only 5′1.
Both of my children were very alert after the surgery, and I was able to hold both of them in the operating room. Perhaps it’s different in Canada. At no point were my arms tied to the OR table.
While I agree that sections should not become the norm, I think each person will have a different experience. I had virtually no pain for my second section. They send you home with a wonderful med that’s an anti-inflam and pain killer. It was great!
I don’t regret either birth, and am just happy that I have to healthy children… regardless of how they came into the world.
February 19th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
feedingtimeatthezoo says:
I was thinking of this post the other day when I was laying in the hospital and they mentioned the possibility of an emergency-C if the baby started looking bad. I was totally open to whatever it would have taken to make sure bb was OK…but…glad I avoided it all the same!
February 21st, 2008 at 9:31 pm
The Business of Being Born - My Review « A Mama’s Blog says:
[...] for me, and I realized how angry I have been about Ryan’s birth. I have written about my C-section before, but in summary, the only reason I had to have a C-section with Ryan was because he was [...]
February 28th, 2008 at 11:34 pm
Maya's Mom says:
I know that you have full control over the responses on your website however, I feel that your sight scares mothers who have no choice but to have a c-section. Therefore, I would like to share with those mothers, that a c-section is not that bad. I had one in April of 2006 and although recovery was somewhat painful and long. It was not horrible. Infact, I took no pain medication after 5 days ( I was breastfeeding) and my cut healed very well!! They no longer use staples but a bonding glue. You can hardly see the cut and I do not have a mushroom stomach. Every womens experience is different with the majority of women having a good experience with a c-section. The pictures of the lady with the staples is not a picture that represents c-sections today (2008).
March 1st, 2008 at 3:36 am
amamasblog says:
Maya’s Mom,
Thanks for you comments and my intent was not to “scare” any mother, but to offer my story, of my C-section, just like you offered some of your experience with a C-section.
I totally agree with you that some people have wondeful experiences with C-sections. However, one doesn’t really know what their experience will be until AFTER the fact. Even with subsequent C-sections, you have no way of knowing if the second, third, etc. C-section will be wonderful or not- with any surgery there is always a risk of complications.
I have received several e-mails from other women who have chosen not to leave a public comment telling me they too, have had hard recoveries and less than wonderful experiences with their C-sections. One mother who has had four C-sections also pointed out that she has two different scars as well.
Of course I would hope any mother who has to have a C-section has a great experience with it, but personally, those seem to be far and few between. I just heard from a mother who had a C-section three weeks ago, and said she was having a very difficult recovery, and was also having some bonding issues with her baby.
I am glad to hear that they aren’t using staples so much- I still know people that have had staples though, as recently as December 2007. Perhaps more doctors will start using the bonding glue in the future. However, the fact still remains that a C-section causes a scar, which can affect different women in different ways.
My intent for the post was to alert women of some of the issues and complications that they may encounter when they have a C-section. I felt a lot of the information I included in the post was not information that is readily given to women beforehand.
In making any decision about our health, and especially when dealing with bringing a new baby into the world, we should have ALL the facts, information, and possible outcomes disclosed before the surgery.
While having a wonderful experience is certainly a possible outcome (which is great), also having complications and not a wonderful experience is also a possible outcome.
Personally, I always heard about all the wonderful experiences and when I had less than that, it was devastating. Part of my goal in this post is to let women know if they do have complications and have less than an ideal C-section, they are not alone. Also, complications do happen. We don’t want them to, but there are very realistic chances with a C-section that complications can arise hours, days, weeks, months, and even years after.
March 1st, 2008 at 6:31 pm
Amelia says:
Great post! I couldn’t agree more- there isn’t enough information disclosed on the complications involved with c-sections.
March 6th, 2008 at 10:03 am
Kim says:
They still use staples here. In fact, I think bonding glue is more risky. The nurses are don’t like the idea of glue at all. Just hope for a healthy delivery, regardless of the method.
March 7th, 2008 at 10:08 am
amamasblog says:
Kim,
Thanks for you comment on the bonding glue. I have done no research on it at all, and was just going off what Maya’s Mom said about it. I’ll have to research it and write my findings in a follow up post.
March 7th, 2008 at 7:24 pm
Green Tip(s) of the Week #16 - Gift wrap ideas (and a giveaway) | Crunchy Domestic Goddess says:
[...] win and to check out A Mama’s Blog. She discusses everything from attachment parenting to the reality of c-sections, from household projects to life with her two sweet boys. [...]
March 15th, 2008 at 11:29 am
Suburban Oblivion says:
Not having had a c-section, I can’t speak from experience about the topic. That said however, the c-section rate is high enough, I know plenty of people who have had them, and every experience will be different. I know women who had terrible experiences with pain and infection, and I know women who only needed pain pills for 24 hours afterwards and had no problems with infection, breastfeeding, or anyone else. There are so many factors there that influence things.
I think in the end it comes down to picking a GOOD Dr. and preparing yourself for every possibility. Ask what their c-section rate is, and under what circumstances they perform them. I do think a lot of c-secs are done when they could have been avoided, BUT I refuse to villify them based on how many lives are saved due to them.
March 17th, 2008 at 9:22 am
rebecca says:
Unfortunately this is in part an ill-informed account of what a Caesarean section is and is for.
It is unusual for a woman to have her hands restrained in theatre, and most doctors and midwives encourage cuddling, skin-to-skin contact and even feeding whilst the procedure is being completed.
Also, the spinal/epidural medicine DOES NOT ‘dope’ the baby in the least which is one of the reasons this form of anaesthesia is preferred.
I have serious doubts that the picture of the 20-year-old woman is one after FIVE years - more likely FIVE DAYS - you can see that the scar is very pink, that there are still small punture marks from the staples and that in fact there is vertical gum on the skin from the Steristrips (medical tapes) still stuck on the skin.
Of course, no woman should have a Caesarean section if it is not indicated, but your account here only serves to MISINFORM and FRIGHTEN women who may choose or be required to have a section.
I feel very disappointed that there are women out there who have a misguided view of (what is it?) feminism or female empowerment or choice and actually serve to reduce women’s choice and to creat fear and distrust of the nurses and doctors trying to help them.
Please dear readers, use your own intelligence to see that fearmongering only serves to weaken our sex, not strengthen it.
March 23rd, 2008 at 6:28 pm
A Mama's Blog says:
Rebecca,
Here is the link to the picture from the site that says it is 5 years after the surgery. It is about half way down the page. http://www.caesarean.org.uk/ScarPictures.html#group1
After looking at it again, it says the photos are after 11 weeks and 5 years. I was assuming the top group of photos were at 11 weeks, and the bottom set of photos were after 5 years- just seemed like it made sense. After closer review, I do tend to agree with you that the top set of photos are more than likely the ones that are after 5 years and the bottom set of photos in this group are the ones after 11 weeks. I am going to revise the caption to this effect, because I do want as medically accurate post as possible. Thank you for bringing this oversight to my attention.
I want to respond to your comment as well that “the spinal/epidural medicine DOES NOT ‘dope’ the baby in the least which is one of the reasons this form of anaesthesia is preferred.”
With all due respect, I disagree with you on this point. I have read numerous articles and sources which say epidurals and spinals can affect the baby’s alertness, and can make a newborn overly sleepy. Like I said in the beginning of this post, it is not a detailed, medical post, but here is just one of the drawbacks listed from childbirth connection.org, regarding epidurals, “can cause adverse behavioral effects on the newborn.” Not every baby will be affected by an epidural/spinal, but the possibility that they could, does exist. http://www.childbirthconnection.org/article.asp?ck=10190#involved)
On that note, it is NOT my goal to misinform and frighten. I have said before my intent for the post was to alert women of some of the issues and complications that they may encounter when they have a C-section. I felt a lot of the information I included in the post was not information that is readily given to women beforehand.
Furthermore I stated that a lot of this post was based on MY experience with a C-section. I state in my post that sometimes a C-section *IS* the only option. I feel it is important that women, who are faced with having a C-section, should have ALL the information at least presented to them good and bad, regarding C-sections, so they can make an informed choice.
In my experience, and what seems like a lot of others experiences (based from some of the comments here, and private e-mails I have received), none of the negative outcomes were discussed before hand with them. Or they are quickly brushed over, never discussed in any detail.
How many women *may* have decided a C-section wasn’t for them, if they had been given accurate information from their doctors and caregivers beforehand?
I have had a C-section, and what I am finding is most women (myself included) trust their doctors, nurses, and hospitals BEFORE the C-section. However, once complications arise women feel like they were misled by these healthcare providers because the realistic aspect that complications can and do arise, were not fully disclosed to them before the procedure.
Obviously if this doesn’t bother a woman, she is free to choose to have another C-section and speak to whomever she chooses about her experience with her C-section. For those of us who do feel let down and misguided after our C-sections, we are also free to choose not to have another C-section, and we can speak about our experiences as well.
Women (and everyone) have the RIGHT to UNDERSTAND and QUESTION any procedure being done on their bodies. If they don’t know the questions to ask, how will they get accurate answers? If the healthcare providers don’t disclose potential realistic complications of C-sections, how can we say that a woman is making an informed decision? Plainly put-we can’t.
Quite frankly, I DO find it fearful that it doesn’t seem like most doctors and hospitals in general, choose to disclose the complications in detail that could arise because of a C-section. Why aren’t these potential complications discussed in detail with mothers facing a C-section?
Can we really be afraid of something that is not realistic or we know not to be true? Fear is a tool and an instinct that we have for good reason- we usually avoid, or seek to work out, what we are fearful of. If a woman is fearful of potential complications that can arise from a C-section, maybe it is her intuition telling her it may in her best interest to investigate the procedure further, or it may be in her best interest not to have a C-section. If she knows it is the best way for her to have her baby, despite the potential complications, then she is not fearful. This quote sums it up: “Your mind knows only some things. Your inner voice, your instinct, knows everything. If you listen to what you know instinctively, it will always lead you down the right path.” (Henry Winkler- Actor)
March 23rd, 2008 at 10:52 pm
rebecca says:
Thank you for clarifying your position, and I note that the picture that you have amended has been listed twice on that page. Indeed it is the first woman pictured, and on that caption it appears that the scar is 13 days old, which differs from its later label. To my eye, the picture is more consistent with 13 days after surgery rather than 11 weeks for the reasons I outlined above.
I agree wholeheartedly that women should be fully informed about the risks of Caesarean sections or epidural analgesia etc before consenting, but there may be grave risks for mother and baby if either of these interventions are not employed. Women should be informed of the risks of NOT proceeding with Caesarean section too. Presumably you were informed of these risks which is why you consented to the section.
Doctors and nurses have an obligation to not only ‘do no harm’ to the patient from their intervention (such as a Caesar), but they also have an obligation not to allow an unreasonable level of risk from not performing the section. What level of risk to you and your baby should your doctor accept before s/he suggests a Caesarean? Maternal and neonatal mortality in the developed world is a fraction of what it was 50 years ago.
I understand the disappointment at not experiencing a natural (or non-surgical) birth - after all, a Caesarean section is not something little girls think of when they want to be a Mummy. However, they also do not imagine burying a stillbirth or being a fulltime carer of their child for the whole of their life either. In your case, a Caesarean section was recommended in order to reduce these risks to you and your child. Of course, there are cases when a vaginal birth would have been fine and Caesarean was a disaster, but the converse occurs too. Scaring women from Caesarean sections, or creating unneccesary fear in them does no service to women at all. I do not generally accept as gospel the wisdom from a television actor. Telling people that their ‘inner voice’ will see them through is setting them up for failure when they fail to predict the unpredictable. To my mind, this is just another way we fail to support people through their trauma and instead blame the victim for not being able to ’see’ or ’sense’ their future loss, harm or hurt.
I am glad that it appears that despite the emotional and physical trauma of having had a Caesarean section that you and the baby have emerged (relatively) unscathed. I wonder if there are other women out there who lost their children or who are having to care for severely disabled (but nonetheless very much loved) children who would love to have the luxury to mourn the pain and scar of a Caesarean section and be nursing a healthy child. I sometimes think that because birth is so safe now (compared to historically) we focus on these relatively minor side effects of what is essentially a good outcome.
In some ways we forget that the hospital staff are there to actually help us, NOT to misinform or harm us. Some may see it as a shame that childbirth has become so medicalised, but without this medicalisation, can we guarantee such safety in childbirth? I am not sure. The vast majority of women could deliver in a field without as much as another person to act as an accoucher, but for those women who were always going to get into trouble then we need to have a system in place to save them and their babies.
You have said that women trust the hospital staff *before* the section, but grow to mistrust them afterwards when complications develop. Would you trust them more if no complications developed? Do you really believe that the people who work in these jobs working terrible hours really want something bad to happen to you? That they are conspiring against you because they want you to have an ugly scar and to experience pain and an infection? Is this really likely? Or is it more likely that they recommended the Caesarean because they were truly concerned about the health of you and the baby, and the (relatively minor) effects you have experienced are sadly a byproduct of giving you the safest means of delivery. How much trust would you have in them if they did not recommend the Caesar and your baby died?
I am constantly disappointed at the way in which women try to undermine each other especially with regard to the business of childbirth. We talk about women helping each other and being strong for each other, we try to encourage our daughters not to let a man walk all over her, that she is as intelligent and powerful as any man and that she should and will have the same opportunites as men. We treat men who are sexist or misogynist with derision. Yet I cannot understand why women cannot be more encouraging and supportive of each other when it comes to birth and the choices they make leading up to and during the process of childbirth. We are made to feel inferior if we accepted analgesia during labour (especially epidural), we are ‘cop-outs’ if we elect to have a Caesarean section, we are failures if we cannot birth a child vaginally, and we try to frighten other women who may have no option but to have a Caesarean.
Caesarean sections are major surgery, there is no doubt. I am sure that there will be cases of women who are dissatisfied with the outcome after a section, as you are. Remember though that the countless emails you have received are not a representation of all the women who have undergone Caesarean. It is only the dissatisfied who come to the internet to seek others. The vast majority of women who have had a section are happy and healthy, and possible grateful too. These women are out there but rarely email you.
March 28th, 2008 at 1:32 am
A Mama's Blog says:
Rebecca,
I don’t think doctors and nurses are out to harm anyone, BUT they are confined by the hospital procedures, and the fear of being sued.
The ONLY reason a C-section was recommended to me, was because my baby was breech, and the doctors don’t attend breech births anymore- at least it is very rare here in the USA for them to do so. The reason they don’t, is fear of litigation. So when they are confined, and have to work under guidelines like this, how can they make the best decision for their patients?
My doctor told me flat out delivering a vaginal breech baby is not any more “dangerous” than a regular vaginal birth. I had not other complications where a C-section would have been “needed’ other than my baby was in the breech presentation. But because medical schools aren’t even teaching breech vaginal delivery anymore, women with breech babies are automatically given the “choice” of a C-section. Unless they can happen to find a doctor relatively close to them or a midwife (providing the state they live in allows midwives to attend breech births), they are out of options. A C-section is the *only* way they can deliver their baby in the hospital. What kind of choice is that? Assuming you do want the expertise of a doctor and nurses, it is that, or find another place to have your baby.
I refuse to believe no matter how many medically necessary C-sections there are, that it is in the best interest of *every* woman with a breech baby to have an automatic C-section, just for that reason. That is a *major* flaw in the birthing system in the US. I just had a friend who was told she would be delivering via C-section, ONLY because her baby was breech. This standard procedure for delivering babies because they are breech is not in the best interest of women and their babies every time.
Ideally, I would like to see hospitals offering a CHOICE- a real choice to women, not in medically necessary cases where a C-section IS the best option, but in cases like where a woman has no other complications or problems, and the only reason she is being told she has to have a C-section is because the doctors and hospitals are practicing defensive medicine. If we never make our dissatisfaction with C-sections known, how can we expect this situation ever to improve?
Women were flocking out of hospitals in droves in the US in the 1970’s; because of the way they were being treated there. Fathers were not allowed in delivery rooms, babies were not allowed to room in with their mothers, and were only allowed to breastfeed every 4 hours among other things. Eventually the hospitals changed their procedures when they realized they were losing patients and money. The mothers and families who were not satisfied with the birthing experience then, made it known, and policies and procedures were changed. We are still seeing a lot of those improvements today in hospitals, where fathers can attend the birth, babies and mothers are roomed together, and mothers can breastfeed on demand.
I have stated several times that sometimes a C-section is medically necessary and is the only option and the safest option. I have nothing against any woman who has had a C-section, for whatever reason. That is her decision. I am not judging them, or trying to “undermine” them. I am trying to bring to light issues and complications that can arise from C-sections, whether they are deemed medically necessary or not.
I wholeheartedly believe that every woman does have instincts that can guide her in making the best decision for her and for her baby. I certainly don’t think everything Henry Winkler says is “gospel,” but his quote is applicable when listening to your instincts.
Like you poined out, women will come to this post because they are dissatisfied with their C-section experience and they are seeking answers and possibly hoping things can change so when they have another baby, or their friends, or even their daughters, have babies, they won’t have to have the bad experience that they had when giving birth by C-section. If nothing else, I hope they realize that they are not alone, and not every C-section ends up being a good experience for every woman.
I can say wholeheartedly, if I knew ahead of time what I wrote about in the post, I would have seriously considered not having my breech baby at the hospital. I would have pursued a midwife. The realistic possibilities of the complications involved with a C-section were not fully disclosed to me, so I did not have all the information I needed to make the best choice for me and my baby. That is the entire point of my post- women deserve to have the possible complications disclosed to them BEFORE the C-section.
I am sure there are lots of blogs and other Internet sites where women who are happy with their C-sections can express this, and I want to keep this blog post a place for women who don’t feel satisfied and happy with their C-sections, a safe place where they can express these feelings.
Despite us having a few issues where we agree, I think we just need to put this to rest now, and agree to disagree generally on this, and realize we see these issues very differently. I am not going to change your feelings and beliefs, and you are not going to change mine. I am glad we could have a civil exchange on the topic, and I thank you for that.
March 28th, 2008 at 1:34 pm
The Reality of C-Sections « A Mama’s Blog says:
[...] Reality of C-Sections This post has moved, and can now be found by clicking HERE. It has been moved to the new A Mama’s Blog site. Thank [...]
April 19th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
chezartz.com » Blog Archive » 5 Things Much Scarier Than Childbirth says:
[...] I feel qualified to comment on this topic (although my blogging pals have great posts on the c-section and medicalized birthing debates). The mother that Time cites in this article admits that fear of a [...]
April 20th, 2008 at 8:21 pm
Karen says:
Although I agree with some of what you say, I have to say I do not agree with most of it. I feel like you are scaring the woman that will require or do elect to have a c-section. I had a horrible vaginal birth with my 1st child which took months almost a year before I felt normal again. I elected to have a c-section and I had a positive experience. Yes, I vomited during the first part of the surgery and was giving antiemetics and immediately felt better, once the baby was born they handed her to my husband who placed her next to me. They kept her in the room with me and placed her on my chest to transport us to recoverey. I was able to bond and spend time with her…sure I was sore once the pain meds wore off but no more than after vaginal delivery, just in a different spot…I recovered very quickly within 2 weeks or so I felt great. I am sorry you had a bad experience but people should know there are good and bad to all methods of delivery….
April 28th, 2008 at 1:20 pm
irem says:
I had a “so called emergency” c/sec during pushing phase due to failure to progress. I still have doubts. This c/sec could be a panic choice. My dr. said the time is up, she said she did not want to loose time waiting this(me pushing). Despite the unfriendly hospital room with a wide open door so that other people could see and hear me during contractions-while i was in need of privacy- actually an indifferent dr. and inexperienced nurses; i still trusted myself and wanted that i could do it. I wish i was armed with a birth doula(which at that time difficult to find here in turkey) and i had changed my dr.(and hosp.)to a considerate one who would support me and communicate me.But it happened. I admit I made mistakes. So much loaded myself with guilt, now i would like them(hosp. stuff, dr) also to share the part in what has happened.
Dr.s also should now how women feel after a cesarean. This emotional burden is hard to deal with. If I had the feeling that I had done everything to avoid this, but it happened; then i would get over with it easier. But there was much work inside myself that i did not do. First of all respecting myself so that i could give some time in searching other doctors and hospitals. Experience is the best thing I have in my hands now!
I appreciate your apprach to warn other women in similar situations. Though I think the issue is not about c/sec, but c/sec due to a specific reason under specific circumstances. so the title “reality about cesarean” is misleading because this essay is about your personal experience which is genuine.
It is inspiring that you had finally a vbac and you were indeed lucky to be surrounded by the right people who would support you in this. and you were lucky to be healty as well!i would love to read your vbac story and i would love to learn how you earned your vbac experience.
Best.
May 2nd, 2008 at 4:49 am
Jungleswife says:
I had three C-sections - the first one was due to a breach. I didn’t find out until later that sometimes they can turn the baby. No one ever mentioned it, and I know they didn’t try.
I had infections following each one.
Until I watched my daughter-in-law give birth the regular way, I was pretty angry about the whole thing.
My grandson wasn’t breach, but his arm was across his face. She had a tough delivery and recovery, and he did, too. Thankfully, they are both fine now.
I hope that, if nothing else, those who read your post will be more understanding when their friends or family members have C-sections. I felt like people treated me the same as anyone else who just had a baby.
A new baby is a happy event, but recovering from major surgery while nursing every two hours and all the other demands of a new baby (even with help)…wow!
The mom will appreciate get-well wishes and assistance during the lengthy recovery process.
May 3rd, 2008 at 8:59 pm
Jungleswife says:
Oops, spelled “breech” incorrectly - maybe something else, too. *blush*
May 3rd, 2008 at 9:01 pm
elquny says:
i am prego with twins and both are breech as of now(6mo). if they dont turn over then i will have to have a c setion. my first baby was 8.5 pounds and a natural birth. i dont want a c section, never did and don’t think it’s cool.. what else can i do?? do i force my doctor to deliver my babies breech? i don’t mind. i wish i knew how to find a doctor that specializes in breech births. any suggestions??? thank u for the information also…
May 7th, 2008 at 9:23 pm
Linda says:
I had twins 3 weeks agao. Both were breech and I felt I had no option but to deliver c section. I have had four vaginal births which I loved. The labor is awesome and truly a way to bond with your husband. The babies being pushed through the birth canal - no better experience in life.
My c section was awful. How can having a baby or in my case babies as a result of major abdominal surgery, having your guts ripped, your uterus cut way open be a pleasant experience.
I had perfect muscle tone prior to this awful surgery and escaped even a twin pregnancy without stretch marks. Now I have a 6 1/2 long incision. And by the way for whoever says that doctors do not use staples anymore well they do at Hoag Hospital in Newport Beach, California. And yes, they looked like Frankenstein. I intend to do everything possible to get rid of the hideous scar. Yes, the babies are beautiful but I care about my body. I have to live with it and how it looks for the rest of my life.
May 13th, 2008 at 5:50 pm
StellaOlla says:
I had my very first section 4 days ago in Washington State, and I can also confirm that staples are still in use there as well.
The decision to have a section was reached jointly by me and my doctor at the end of a very long labor. I have to say, I am very disappointed, especially after working so hard for so long towards a natural birth, but on the other hand, my little girl is healthy and my experience with the pain differs vastly from yours. My incision is very small and is healing fast. I may be an unusual case, though, so I commend you for your well-written post. There are many alternatives to c-sections for women with complications in late pregnancy, and it’s sad that many people aren’t given the option to choose.
June 8th, 2008 at 5:45 pm
mom2be says:
Thank you for posting these pictures. The abdomens of your “scar models” have clearly been ruined by their pregnancies (stretchmarks and celulite) making the C-section scars barely noticable even though they are so fresh. I can see also from the pictures you posted of your own stomach that you didn’t suffer that fate as most women do (myself included) thus I can understand why you are more self concious of your ONE scar. I have HUNDREDS from my baby and whether I deliver vignially or surgically I’m bound to end up with more scars from EITHER “option”. You can do as much research as you want, ask as many questions as you can, compare as many statistices as you can, take as many precautions or preventative measures as is humanly possible (I did), but when it comes right down to it you are at the mercy of chance, nothing more. Some women are lucky, some women aren’t. Unlucky women will develope tearing, scarring, infection, permanent bladder snd sexual disfunction etc. etc. etc. from having children no matter WHICH method they choose or how well informed they are. So rather than getting your hopes up I propose that you simply ask yourself a question: do you feel lucky… well, do you?
June 9th, 2008 at 8:25 am
jess says:
I have had a c-section and have to disagree! I had little to no pain with it and was very happy with the procedure! I do NOT think you did alot of ACTUAL research but mainly based things on your opinions of the prcedure
June 17th, 2008 at 8:04 pm
jess says:
To add a 1little…Maybe it is your Dr. who is the reason for the Horrible Experience…
June 17th, 2008 at 8:06 pm
Ree says:
Maya’s Mom: I’m glad your experience with c-section was not as scary as others. But I think you may be an exception to the rule. I had a c-section in March ‘08. They still use staples. My body is not what it used to be and I’m only 27! I have that horrible belly flap. And Yes! It was a long and painful first and second months. I’ve heard of women who recover faster (my friend has had 4 ceasarians and comes home from the hospital to bake cookies), but that is not the majority. My doctors asked me again, and again if I had help for the first few weeks home with my daughter. Living in a two-story home, I needed the help. I think this story is very well written. Every pregnant woman should be prepared for a c-section and should not expect it to be easy. You could be very disappointed, as I was.
June 20th, 2008 at 2:22 pm
A Mama's Blog says:
Jess-
Thanks for your comment, and I realize obviously, everyone has different experiences. I have done extensive research on C-sections, but I didn’t want this post to be a research post- I wanted to share my experience with my C-section.
For the record, I have had a doctor and a surgical resident send me private e-mails on this post. There was one inaccuracy about the procedure that the surgical resident pointed out to me, a few days after the post was published that has since been corrected.
While this post isn’t intended, nor claims to be a medical description of the procedure, I strive to keep it as medically accurate as possible- not just my opinion on the surgery. If it isn’t medically accurate, I have not been notified of any errors of the medical procedure, other than the one I mentioned, that has since been corrected. The doctor who e-mailed me privately told me it was an interesting perspective, but did not tell me there were any inaccuracies in it.
I hope and think it is vital for doctors to explain in detail all the potential positive and negative outcomes of C-sections. However, I still feel the reality is, for the most part, women are not informed on the entire procedure and possible outcomes (negative) of a C-section.
When they have less than what was explained to them, it is very hard and conflicting to work through, and affects the entire family. I’m glad you had a great experience with your C-section, but the fact remains there are a lot of women who don’t.
June 20th, 2008 at 9:45 pm
Cheryl R says:
Oh my, my. I don’t even know where to start. And besides, most everything has been covered between your post, the comments & your replies to them.
I got pregnant for the first time at age 38, always wanted a baby, opportunity or accident had just never arisen. But there I was, knocked up & thrilled! I immediately hired a Doula, read every book on midwifery and “natural childbirth” I could get my hands on, avoided books like “What to Expect” as much as possible. Tried to pick an OB that would respect my wishes to have a NON-invasive birthing experience. Opted NOT to have invasive procedures during my pregnancy either, no Amnio or other unnecessary or risky tests (much to the OB’s chagrin given my “Advanced Maternal Age”), no glucose testing, limited Ultrasounds, etc. I also didn’t want to be induced, didn’t want any pain meds or epidural, no episiotomy, goodness knows NO c-section, etc. Mostly, I wanted to be left alone to do what my body already KNEW how to do… have my baby at my own pace, walking around, NOT tied down to monitors or IV’s or nurses constantly checking to see if I’d effaced or dilated further.
Since I got pregnant during a 4-day span of time after 1 and 1/2 years of celibacy, I knew when I would be due. I went two weeks PAST that due date, but my doctor had been bugging me to induce since I’d been approximately 34 weeks. He kept telling me my baby was going to be HUGE.
I walked, I drank Castor oil, consumed mass quantities of spicy food, I “stimulated” my nipples ad nauseum, had sex as often as possible, etc. but STILL no baby at 42 weeks.
Finally, worn down from weeks of badgering by an OB that I had grown to distrust & dislike over the course of my otherwise wonderful pregnancy, I agreed to be induced. Knowing it would increase my chances of C-Section by over 50%. Knowing it would decrease my chances of being successful at breast feeding. Knowing I’d likely have terrible labor pains, and a very lengthy recovery. Against my better judgement & all those facts, I did it anyway.
Please remember, I was more educated than MOST women in America about my choices. If Medi-Cal had been willing to pay for it, I’d have Home Birthed without hesitation. I did NOT want an elective C-Section. I had a great Doula that was on board w/ my birthing philosophy. I was SO ready to do things the “natural” way, no pain killers, no dulling of the experience. I had loved being pregnant, I was going to embrace the process of what my amazing body could do to bring my daughter into the world.
Long story short? After I was induced, they wanted to monitor the baby constantly, they wanted me in a supine position (this I refused), the nurses would NOT leave me alone and kept asking me if I “wanted my epidural now”. After 15 hours of very intense (but also very doable) labor, I finally agreed to the epidural b/c they told me it’d let me get some rest & maybe it’d speed up the dilation (I hadn’t gotten past 5cm).
Well you can imagine what happened. I got 2 hours of sleep. They checked my cervix again. Still at 5cm. I got wheeled into the OR for an “emergency c-section” b/c they were concerned about the baby’s heartbeat & blood pressure. Despite what some knucklehead above said, they DO strap you down on the table. They DO deliver your entire guts, womb, etc. right onto your belly. They didn’t do a good job doping me up b/c I could FEEL the pain of the surgery while it was going on, but I wasn’t able to TELL them b/c I had an oxygen mask on.
They do NOT let you hold your baby when they are trying to stitch you up afterwards. I had a bleed out from my large intestine, so as I cried for water or ice cubes (never been that thirsty in my life) and cried of course for them to give me my baby, they whisked her off to the nursery where they promptly gave her tests & poked her w/ needles, then decided that my ELEVEN POUND baby needed to be in the NICU b/c she had low hematocrit levels.
7 hours after I was finally resting in my room recovering from the trauma above, a doctor finally came in to tell me WHY I still hadn’t seen my baby — even though I’d been pointedly rude and pissed off about it all damn day.
I didn’t get to see her until almost 12 hours after they’d taken her from my belly. She was in an incubator, hooked up to monitors and IV’s, etc. I was not allowed to hold her, or breast feed her for FOUR and 1/2 DAYS. The nurses were able to hold her, but I wasn’t allowed to. And of course, they gave her bottles during that time. So of course, by the time I finally got to hold her and try to breast feed, she wasn’t having anything to do with it… no instant gratification from MY nipples, they were flat & my milk hadn’t come in fully, despite pumping every two hours in my hospital bed.
She had to stay in hospital for 8 days while she finished her course of antibiotics while I went home to recover from my surgery ALONE (I’m a single mother). I couldn’t get off the couch. I had a drain in my incision b/c of all the excess fluid which got infected. I could hardly walk. I certainly couldn’t laugh or cough or even poop very well.
I know this sounds like a freakin’ horror story, but the sad thing is that based on MY research (and the research of other moms like you, midwives, doctors, etc.), this is indeed the reality for many moms in the US. C-sections are at an epidemic rate in this country. Celebrities are pushing it along certainly, but so are the OB’s that perform them.
I am still of the belief that birthing a child is NOT a medical event. The doctor should only be there to “catch” the baby, but even THAT I could have done if given a chance.
Is it possible that my eleven pound, 6 ounce. 23.5″ long baby would never have engaged in the birth canal? Of course. In fact, it’s likely she wouldn’t have.
But did they need to do what they did even AFTER she was born to further make our bonding complicated?
My daughter is now a healthy, happy, well adjusted 2 year old. Yes, obviously it’s MOST important that she made it here safely. But I do feel cheated out of the birthing experience that I wanted & dreamed of. I feel like my choices were taken away from me b/c the doctors and nurses assumed I had NO idea what I was talking about, b/c they know all, and we know nothing.
And I will never, ever forget how distressed and lonely and heartbroken I felt during that time. Which really sucked after having 42 such wonderful weeks of being pregnant.
Nothing I can do to change it certainly. But if I (and women like you) can educate even ONE woman about the fact that C-sections are major surgery and not some piece of cake “procedure”… I’ll be satisfied with that.
Big hugs to you and to all the other mamas who feel they got shortchanged from the experience they wanted.
P.S. Breastfeeding is still possible for women who have C-Sections (just not as likely). My childhood best friend had three C’s w/ babies all over 10 pounds, has silicone breast implants AND was able to produce enough milk to feed her babies AND mine. Which she did with wondrous generosity b/c I was never able to get more than a few ounces even after 5 weeks of trying w/ a lactation consultant. Sigh.
Thanks again for this post!!
Mama Cheryl
@jasperblu on twitter
June 21st, 2008 at 2:36 pm